Happy Fifth of July! I’ve been so thrown that it is indeed now Wednesday, especially because it feels the Fourth (or any holiday really) always falls on a weekend or a Friday/Monday. I’m okay with this short week, but after Four days of festivities, I’m certainly grateful for the time to catch up. Definitely planning on checking things off the list that have piled up over the weekend today and hopefully finish decorating my room this week! Before I get to that…
Something that has been on my mind quite frequently the past few weeks has been how to handle critique.
I wish I could say I was someone who didn’t let critique get me down, especially harsh critique, but that would definitely not be true. I’ve always been someone who takes what people say about me or something I do quite seriously. I will internalize a compliment or comment and try to figure out how to best move forward.
However, sometimes I take things a little too personally. I worry too much about how people view me, how my decisions are viewed by others and how my actions could possibly result in a negative impact on others. I have been known to over-analyze every decision even through the eyes of my peers so that I can try to see how they’re viewing me. It’s kind of awful when I think about how much other’s thoughts of me change the way I make decisions and act.
This critique sometimes makes me question myself and whatever I do. The questions seem to swirl often, questions like “What will people think of me if I do this?” “Will this idea be accepted?” “Am I out of my league here?”
Without realizing how far this has taken me, I unknowingly become down. I’m so fearful about how people will view me that I automatically feel angry/upset/frustrated with myself. Kind of stupid, right?
Have you ever taken people’s critique seriously…more than once? Twice? All the time?
I think too many of us do this throughout our lives. We live in earnest belief that we need to please others. And to some degree…we do. But not to the point where we are constantly dragging ourselves down.
When I finally realized what I was doing to myself, I had to take a step back. Yes. There were situations where what I would say and do was important, such as work, but there were situations where I would become too down on myself. For instance, when trying on clothes I would have to convince myself that sometimes wearing different clothing than I normally do was okay. It still is! I told myself I needed to stop worrying so much about others.
I needed to stop worrying so much about others because in the end, the only person who needed to handle the critique was myself.
Yes, we can hear critique from others around us, but it’s up to us how we handle it. We can either accept the compliments, listen to the critique then take it into account if it is deemed necessary, or we can be completely down on ourselves for a negative comment. The choice is absolutely ours.
If negativity and critique is something you find you cannot handle, then start to make some changes.
1 // Surround yourself with people who will love, care, support, and most of all, who are honest with you. You owe yourself that much! You have so much potential and courage to go far in life. Take all critique with a grain of salt.
2 // Take a step back and determine if the critique you’ve just received is actually valid. (Some is, some isn’t!) Figure out if something in your life really does need to change. Go to a trusted friend or family member for advice to see if there’s something you need to change.
3 // Pray about it. Sometimes praying can make all the difference.
Critique can help us to grow…only if we let it.
No matter what kind of critique you’re facing, don’t let it weigh you down. You’re too strong to let it! Keep on fighting and be willing to step out and be yourself. Don’t take critique too seriously, because after all, you know the best way you want to live your own life.
What are some ways you handle critique?
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